In my defense, I'd do it again...

Things in my neck of the woods have been good! I've had my days where I've been down, and thinking "Paige, why the HELL did you do this?" and then I ask myself... "well, the real question is... would you do it again?" and the answer is always "yes, most DEFINITELY" so, then... what's the problem? and the answer to that one is... me. I am the problem, and now... I'm over it.

sweet.

On another note: I have my huge exam tomorrow, that I've probably studied for about an hour for... total. So, I'm flipping out a little, but I'm sure I'll be okay (hopefully). I usually do alright, so we'll see. I would like to get an A, and I'm capable of it but I have no motivation. I'm just ready to get up north and play with babies! MAN. I can't WAIT.
Anyway... I'm going to miss the beach dreadfully though. Good thing I have a 3 week stint of beaching before I start work *wooooord*. Okay, I have to study. I love you and miss you all... everyday.

hakuna mattatta

No worries. Hmmm... if I could master that, I'd be set. What's interesting is that I worry about the things that I shouldn't CARE about and don't worry about the things that I really SHOULD care about. I'm not worried about the massive exam that will determine whether or not I'm qualified to teach English. I'm not worried about the homework, I'm not worried about much. But I worry about whether people that I am only going to be around for a month (2 weeks now) like me or not, when I have people at home that love me more than life... and I'm worried about people that I will probably never see again in my life. I haven't been myself, I've been over sensitive (more than usual) and I've isolated myself at least 4 times a day, while everyone else sits in groups laughing and talking. I just feel so naive with all of these people. They're all older, and they've all been to so many places and through so many things, while I'm sitting here, a stupid 21 year old girl that's insecure in who she is and is just here because she didn't know what else to do... I feel out of place, which isn't atypical of me, but it is stupid because... well, none of these people know me. I'm not certain that I even know me, so how could anyone else?
On a brighter note: This weekend I went to an island called Koh Yao Noy, which is exactly what Thailand should be. Palm trees, ocean and peace. It was absolutely GORGEOUS. I rented a motorcycle and drove all over the island (scary, I know, but I did really well!) And i had a blast! The ferry rides were probably my favorite part though... being on a motorised long boat in the middle of the ocean, seeing all of these massive islands in the distance... mountains that barely find their way out of the ocean. It is beautiful. The sky in Thailand seems so much bigger than anywhere else. I decided that it's because there is a freedom about Thailand that you can't find anywhere else... and because there aren't as many massive buildings, but I like the other explaination better. haha.
Anyway, Things are okay, you could even say great because the good definitely outweighs the bad... but, I have been homesick... I have been sick... but I have also been here, which is the best place to be. ever.

well well well. I guess it's about time that I updated this thing huh? So much is happening and so quickly that I"m not really sure where to begin. I'm pretty sure that very very few people bother to read this... they just send me emails asking me to repeat everything, lol, but that's okay.
Well, this week has been awesome! We started teaching, first we observed teachers in action.. monday and tuesday and then on wednesday we taught our first lesson. I think I did really well. I was pretty proud of myself. I made the students laugh, was able, with some difficulty, to communicate my points. The tough thing is that even if I did speak Thai, I wouldn't be able to in the classroom. It's required that we use only english to communicate, which makes things really difficult. Yesterday we had our first Thai lesson in the same format, all in Thai, and I understand now how hard it is to understand what the hell we're saying. haha. But it was helpful, though I already knew what we learned.
I've made some friends, and am laughing quite a bit. I haven't been myself completley, but I'm getting there.
I have a cold that is NO FUN, particularly since several people went out last night, and I couldn't because I was snotting all over the place. (gross). But you can bet that my little butt went to the beach yesterday and laid in the sun (I even used sunscreen!!). Anyway, I'm keeping busy and trying not to get too sick, though it's a tendency of mine. Alright, let me know what's going on with all of you! I miss you!

So, this is where I find myself... and I'm in Love.

Hey everyone! I finally figured out how to make this thing show up in English! lol. I am safe and having the time of my LIFE here in Phuket. It is absolutely beautiful.
I arrived at my hotel around 9pm Thursday evening. When I arrived I was greeted by a crowd of about 15 native english speakers sitting in front of the hotel drinking beer and talking, which was such an awesome way to arrive. I pulled my luggage up the steps to my 3rd floor hotel room where I have two twin beds, air conditioning, a closet, television and refridgerator all to myself, it gets a little lonely. I spent friday shopping and getting to know a few of the girls on the trip which was wonderful. We found a MASSIVE mall and wandered around. They all needed clothes... I brought an entire wardrobe, so I just talked... and danced some, not getting quite the reaction I had hoped, but I had fun nonetheless. Friday evening a girl named Jessica arrived and a group of us went to dinner and laughed and goofed off. Jessica, conveniently, is housed in the room next to me. Our rooms are quite rooms, which means that there is a door inbetween our rooms, which we now keep open and blast music through and giggle, and it's been absolutely wonderful.
Saturday a group of us found our way to Niaharn Beach, which is about 30 minutes from the hotel. It was one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen... I'll put pictures up as soon as I can. It was a wonderful way to spend the day. That evening a girl named Lisa (there are 3 lisas in this group!!) from England arrived, and since then I have spent the majority of my time with her and Jessica laughing and carrying on, which has been awesome.
I was so afraid of being lonely and sad, but so far I haven't had enough time to really mope. It has been so awesome! Yesterday, Jessica, Lisa and I went to an Area called Chalong Bay, where we went to a local restaurant that was absolutely AMAZING. Then we wandered along the beach, which is a fishing area, so we couldn't really swim, but we waded a bit, and then sat on a bridge over the water for awhile and took pictures. I had an awesome day, honestly.
I'm meeting such interesting people, most of whom have lived ALLLLL over the world, I, even with my travel, which most people seem to think is extensive, I feel incredibly naive and inexperienced. It is really good to hear about all of these incredible people. There are people from EVERYWHERE. Yesterday we met a couple of guys from Glasgow, Scottland, and they came and hung out with us which was a blast.
I have laughed so much... so noone needs to worry about me. The only issue is that I desperately need a hug... I haven't had a hug in about 6 days, which is toooo long. lol.
I had my first class today, and it seemed quite short, but it was 2 hours. The staff all seem to be really cool, laid back, and even better, knowledgable and willing to help.
We start teaching Wednesday.... HERE WE GOOOOOOO!!!

keep your arms and legs inside the ride at all times...

So, I'm sitting in JFK international, waiting to board the plane (I have close to an hour). I expected there to be a line, and that security would be crazy, but there was no line at check in... so that took about 5 minutes. Then my mom and I got massages... I bought ANOTHER dang book, and we said our goodbyes. There are only 99 people on my flight... an international flight... on a massive plane. So, I should have lots of room to spread out. The guy that checked me in made it so that I would be completely alone... which I guess means that I won't be seated next to my soul mate... unless I have no soul mate, which is possible. lol. That's a big fat joke anyway. So, it took me about 5 minutes to get through security and now I'm sitting here doing NOTHING, which is what I'm going to be doing for the next, oh, 22 hours.
I handed my phone over, so, I feel naked. Anyway, I'll be in Thailand this time tomorrow(for you guys... it'll be 10:15 at night there... 12 hours ahead, you know). Anyway, this is going to be QUITE the adventure. wooooowoooo!